📱 The Quitter’s Gym App
The only fitness app designed to keep you on the couch.
$1.99 / month
Less than a protein bar. Way more fun.
What’s Inside
😴 Daily Demotivational Quote
Start every morning with a quote designed to keep you in bed. “The only bad workout is the one you actually did.”
🏋️ Workout of the Day (Don’t Do It)
Every day we post a workout. Every day we tell you why you shouldn’t do it. Today’s WOD: “Open fridge. Close fridge. Repeat 3 sets.”
🎯 Excuse Generator
500+ scientifically-crafted excuses. From “Mercury is in retrograde” to “I think I pulled something last Tuesday.”
🏆 Quitter Achievements
Earn badges for your dedication to not trying. Unlock “7-Day Streak of Doing Nothing” and the coveted “Ate Pizza Instead of Going to the Gym” platinum trophy.
😂 Funny Fitness Pics
A daily feed of the most relatable fitness memes. Because laughing burns calories. (It doesn’t, but we’ll say it does.)
📊 Anti-Progress Tracker
Track rest days, snacks consumed, and gym sessions avoided. Watch your Quitter Score™ climb as your fitness goals plummet.
Download Now
Available on iOS and Android. $1.99/month. Cancel anytime.
(We expect you to. We’re literally called Quitter’s Gym.)